The resurrection gives my life meaning and direction and the opportunity to start over no matter what my circumstances. ~Robert Flatt
Well, with Easter weekend here I feel like it is time for me to reflect on my own life. Even in my lowest times I have always had a wonderful family who would bend over backwards for me. I can honestly say that I thank God everyday for the amazing life he has given me. I have to admit, just about everyday I come to the conclusion that people really do suck now. I know that sounds awful, but it's true. Then, I read a story about something amazing someone did and it never fails to bring tears to my eyes. Yes, there are so many bad people who can bring your mood down, but there are a lot of wonderful people who can lift your spirits and renew your faith in the human race.
I can't say that I have always woken up and rejoiced that the sun was shining and that I was alive to see another day. I had some bad things happen to me that I let keep me down for years. In high school I rarely let anyone get close to me and that continued on through college. Even the people that appeared to be my best friends, never really seemed to know me. In college, I had a boyfriend that in all honesty I cared a great deal for, but if it wasn't for the hardships in his life, I wouldn't have kept him around. I wanted to help him. I guess because at the end of the day, I didn't have a clue how to help myself. I was walking around with my cross around my neck pretending I knew God. It was like I always heard, "you can go to church, but it doesn't make you a Christian anymore than walking into McDonalds makes you a hamburger." I was depressed and didn't want to be around anyone else. Truth be told, I'm still running, but more to start over now. I know I have come off cold in the past, but deep down I have an extremely big heart. I had always been exceedingly afraid of someone seeing me as vulnerable. Of someone seeing me cry or hurt or love or care; and because of that I ruined a lot of close or potential friendships. I no longer care if people see my emotions, and I mean that. I've grown to understand that strength isn't about bottling everything up inside, but really being able to be yourself and be comfortable with who you are. I'm excited for the new beginnings and new life that God has put in front of me. I'm happy that Easter not only allows us to remember Christ's resurrection, but our own rebirths each year.
A great song that sums up how I feel:
I'm Not Who I Was by Brandon Heath
On a more somber note...my Twins...are like all kinds of sick or hurt. Tonight's game being rained out was kinda-sorta-maybe a blessing. I knew God was a Twins fan! ;) I'm hoping for a happy, healthy lineup so we can start winning some games. And here's to keeping Luke Hughes in the majors! I am thoroughly impressed with him and the way Butera has stepped up behind the plate. I'd prefer to see Hughes at 2nd and Nishioka at shortstop. I like Casilla, but his offense is extremely weak and in general always has been. If Tsuyoshi's Japanese Gold Gloves hold true, his defense will be a strong enough replacement. Let Hughes get comfortable playing in the bigs and I think he will surprise people. I was actually rather ticked to see him moved down at the start of the season. I am beyond excited that Cuddy has started hitting, I knew he would. I'm a firm believer he is the MVP on the team. Thome and 591!! Only 9 more homers and he will be in the 600 club! A great achievement for an even better guy.
Oh, and I've been saying all along Boston would turn it around. The American League Eastern Division is going to be tough this year. I'm a Carl Crawford fan and I'm still waiting for his numbers to begin to rise. They will, trust me. He batted .307 last year and has consistently batted above or around .300. His .128 will rise to normal eventually. I feel like when you sign a 7 year, $142 million contract you have a target on your back. He knows it, too. I've seen it in the comments about Joe Mauer from Minnesota fans. These guys are not demanding these contracts, they are offered them. Who is going to refuse? Once the money starts to roll in the fans expect perfection. They believe you are getting paid an astronomical amount and should never fall short of their unworldy expectations. He played for Tampa Bay from 2003-2010, if he was given some time to adapt before everyone starting asking for his head and wallet, he might not be doing this poorly.
The NFL draft is coming up this week and my Vikings need some good rookie talent! We need a winning season...it feels like it's been forever.
Um, Blackhawks and Caps?! Yeah buddy! I think the Canucks awoke a sleeping giant in my Blackhawks, and thank goodness! The talent has been there all season, it just seems like they fall asleep during the games. They'll be skating hard and playing aggressive then all of a sudden it's like they just want a mani-pedi and a fluffy pillow to rest their princess heads on. Here's to hoping that drive sticks around because I really don't like the Canucks. They are my hockey equivalent of the Yankees. Bleh.
I fly to Minnesota next week to see my beautiful sister! I'm so very excited, and yet I have enough anxiety I could burst. I didn't think it was possible to get stressed a week before a flight, but as soon as I booked it my nerves went nuts. Flying freaks me out. I do it because it is the fastest way to get there, but really, honestly, I'm worse than a 5 year old. I hold my breath and grip my armrests for dear life. I'm surprised my head doesn't explode. I hope no one is sitting next to me because I manage to look like a goof the whole time. I had to fly to Arkansas recently by myself and I let out a squeal when the plane started rockin. It was a teeny tiny plane. It was all businessmen, they just kind of looked at me like I was nuts. I can't say I blame them. I'm way too old to be acting like this. Anyways, I sincerely have missed Minnesota and can't wait to get back! Kinda hoping I won't be coming back permanently. I love Texas, but I need a break. 23(ALMOST!) years has been long enough. I will miss my Grizzbear though! :(
Speaking of 23 years, my birthday is coming up. It makes me feel old and unaccomplished. I guess that's what happens after 21? Lame.
Big gulps huh? Welp, see ya later!
